Linda G. Robert

Helping You Find the Solutions To Connect to Your LIfe

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The Art of Disapointing

I hate disappointing and in reality I never do it  I don't disappoint, because it's not in my nature to do it, and besides it sucks. The feeling that I get when I disappoint someone, and I know it, is an godforsaken terrible feeling.  Lately,  I've been wanting to make some changes with how I use up my time and this change may disappoint others. or would it?  We sometimes think that our actions will have a major impact in other's life, and while it may, it's not the end of their world.  Imagine that, they move on and go on without you!!!

Sometimes disappointing others means taking care of yourself, so saying yes to you. and while this may sound selfish initially and some may turn their nose up to you,  it's what must be done to help you get grounded again. Well that's where I'm at and everytime I do something that takes up a certain amount of time and energy, it becomes a choice.  I choose to continue to make others happy, when otherwise they probably don't care one way or another. In other words, it's in my head.  I think they'll be disappointed, and they may not be or if they are  they'll get over it, and probably quicker that you can whistle.

Why do we hang on to doing things when we know it's not working anymore? That is the million dollar question and one simple article would not be able to answer that.  The only thing I know for sure is that once I realized that I needed to make some changes and things that I've been doing for a few years now, it got me thinking of several things. Why was I doing  what I was doing?  Why was doing for others so important to me?  Why do I continue to do things this way, when it's not giving me what I want.  Must I sacrifice my desires and true intentions for a moment of feeling good that I've helped someone.  Bottom line, is that when it's time to do something different, something tells you that it is and that thing must be paid attention to. For me, it came to me quite naturally and now I'm preparing myself to make those changes and to possibly disappoint others. 

I've always said that when you say no to something it creates an opportunity for a YES,  an opportunity to become more of who I am meant to be, and the more I'm me, the more freedom I experience. So not disappointing others or thinking that I would be disappointing others, becomes a crutch, a crutch that I've held onto for too long and that I no longer need.  My favorite life coach, Cheryl Richardson, wrote a book a few years ago, "The Art of Extreme Self-Care: Transform Your Life One Month at a Time" and she challenged us to practice the art of disapointing. At one point, I thought "are you frieken kidding me?", why would I want to do that. I get it now.  Get really world!  I'm going to be disapointing you!!!  

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